Mosquito Bites and Sunburns, Oh My!

July Blogger Challenge– #20: Write a post that has some element of humor.

The husband and I went on a cruise for our honeymoon, in 2009. Here we are:

Aww...
Started the cruise like this….

This was taken in our cabin, on the ship.

Now, I want to let you in on our family motto. It will always be: This Will Not End Well. We say this with humor, and humbleness. We recognize and appreciate that even though something looks and seems perfect, something else will always interfere and muck it all up. (Foreshadowing)

Case in point: our cruise. On a cruise, the ship will dock at various locations. Our first stop was Cozumel. (pay attention to how white we are. Yes, this is also foreshadowing.)

cozumel

This stop was absolutely breathtaking. Foo-foo drinks, white sandy beaches and warm waters. It was like heaven.

The next port was in Puerto Vallarta. With a cruise, you have the choice to do something extra-curricular (for an additional fee), and we chose to go horseback riding. We  met with our tour guides, and started the journey through a jungle. I quickly realized just how lax my clothing choice had been for this excursion.

horseback

 

Mosquitos. Hundreds of them, everywhere. They smelled fresh meat, and I was an all you can eat buffet. My husband was smart, and wore long socks, long jeans and sleeves. I wore sleeveless, and I did not wear long socks. The mosquitos knew this. They were praying on the weak link.

It was horrific, hearing the constant whine of mosquitos in your ears, and feel them all over you and knowing you were stuck. The rest of it was great, and our tour guides took great care of us. The views were spectacular.

island

 

Now, somewhere along the way, my husband had become badly burned. Neither of us can recall the exact day this occurred. Was it in Cozumel? The horseback (mis) adventure? While we were sunning ourselves on deck? Who knows? He looked like an overcooked lobster and was in extreme pain.

Neither of us could live with ourselves. My whole body was itching like crazy, and he felt like his body was on fire. We couldn’t sleep. He’d moan and groan, while I scratched like crazy. We purchased Caladryl and Aloe, but it didn’t make things any better for us. The rest of that cruise felt like hell, and by the time we got on our plane to return home, we looked like this:

death
…and ended it like this…

 

This is the way it is for us. This Will Not End Well. It seems no matter how hard we try to make an experience mishap-proof, it never works. There we were, on the most romantic cruise, and neither of us could enjoy it because we were suffering so badly!  So, what’s the best line of defense for us? Humor. This experience (and like so many others before and after it, check out our experience with the killer ants) makes us laugh our asses off. It’s so Us. I don’t know what we’d do, if something actually worked out the way we planned it to, but I’ll tell you what: It makes our memories unforgettable.

Don't we know it?
Don’t we know it?

***

For today’s workout, I ran 3 miles, sprinting roughly 10-15 seconds each lap on the track. I finished up with a few: sit ups, push ups, planks with lifting alternating knees to my chest.

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